Integration of the shadow discovering freedom

It began on the weekend of July 4.  I had this awareness that humans had started to be freed from the systems of control, and it was only through us choosing empowerment that our reality changed.  Though it had been my practice for many areas of my life, there were still many systems that I agreed to that maintained power over me through the authority that I gave to them. 

On that weekend, EVERY firework display was canceled due to COVID, and the place that would display fireworks had strict enforcement about remaining in the car or being fined and arrested.  Because I am changing my agreements to sovereignty, I choose not to participate in events or situations that hold this type of energy unless I have a need and can find no other way.  We just figured it would be an uneventful weekend with our children, bought some sparklers, cooked on the grill, and stayed home.  This family time is a typical summer weekend minus the sparklers.

When the weekend arrived, July 3 brought a firework display that rivaled the professionals right in front of my home.  A group of people had gotten together, pulled their resources, and created a beautiful show for the neighborhoods in the park near my house.  On the fourth, we experienced something even more spectacular, throughout my neighborhood in all directions, there were firework displays that again rivaled the professionals.  Instead of responding to being told where to go with strict guidelines groups within the neighborhoods that pulled together and created their displays instead.  Not just the typical bottle rockets and roman candles, but the spectacular shows of lights that danced together, creating beautiful presentations.  The evening was filled with these firework displays in every direction all night long. Fireworks are not legal without a license here in Ohio, but enforcement was lacking. I saw for the first time what could happen when we said no and tried something new within the community. In changing our agreements, we experienced something so much more.  I had a beautiful relaxing weekend with my family. We never left our home or dealt with any chaos due to any enforcement with which we were not in alignment.

This point is when I began to see the reaction, response, change energy ramp up.  Throughout the month, I observed as the shadows surfaced, bringing the possibility for change into view.  Many of the people surrounding me, including myself, experienced some sort of deep shadow come into awareness through different situations to be integrated through a change in response.  My own shadow brought a feeling of disconnection; I felt as though I was stuck in my physical body by allowing others to have perceived power over me.  A deep feeling of breaking out of confinement programmed beliefs and connection to the raw divine feminine began to immerge from within my sacral area.  I could feel the jolt, and she began to shift much within me. My perceptions began to widen, and another layer was revealed. 

If you read my blog, you know I have been having trouble with doctors and dentists, and what I discovered was it was time to respond differently.  Through this experience, I realize where I internalized my interactions and felt like there was something wrong with me; of course, why else would people treat me this way.  The final straw was several dentist appointments to be referred to a dentist who does not do what I was referred for and did not have an appointment available until October 19.  The current dentist would not make any changes in his plan of care, telling me I have been referred out, and I am done.  NO TWO-WAY communication just not answering my calls for days and then answered in text repeating the referral, and that’s it.  In the meantime, I have a huge hole in my tooth that is causing infection every time something gets in it! The treatment plan is redundant and absurd; I am meant to take this as-is, accept, agree, and comply.

The same thing with the primary care doctor, always wanting to give me a pill or remove a body part, or just downright avoidance tactics, never addressing or searching for underlying issues that have caused the symptom.  This game of power of others, do what I say even if it makes no sense and is not really in your best interest, is a trigger for me. It does not resonate, and I feel the energy reverberation from many interactions like this since birth and across lifetimes.  It is a game of power over others, is based on perception, and if I agree to it, it continues. 

I became aware of the trigger of a lack of accountability, compassion, and the perception of control this month and what my typical reaction to those experiences are deciding on new responses.  I choose empowerment, like the fireworks displays in my neighborhood. I will find another way. To say, no, this is not going to work for me; there is another choice available.  The way you are treating me is NOT okay, and recognizing this treatment has nothing to do with me but is created in the perceptions and beliefs of others is the key. By no longer consenting and seeking a method or practice that does match my energy, with respect, compassion, and accountability, I am changing my agreement.   

I see these systems that assert power over others and have a sense of control built into them.  For instance, the US government right now is like watching pre-teens.  If I did my job like that or cared for my family in this way, I would get fired or be imprisoned.  The government and health care providers work for us! We do not work for them!  And here is the choice in energy; by being subservient and accepting it, we agree to it.

While I am so very sensitive to energy, and at times it physically hurts me, I will stand in choices that do not feel good as the truth is exposed.  It isn’t convenient to have to find all new doctors or change my plan of care altogether, moving away from allopathic medicine in general.  And it doesn’t feel good to face my shadows, observing myself with awareness. However, I am learning to have more compassion and love in this area. It isn’t easy to take action against the status quo that, in every new choice, more people dissolve their relationships with you because of the cognitive dissonance it stimulates.  But it is what I must do to move into sovereignty.

I have discovered this path was solitary over the years, often pushing the boundaries of the perceptions of reality.  Finally, breaking free from the bondage and prison that there is something wrong with me and that I should be ashamed of that something.  Today moving into August, I am beginning to feel a new sense of freedom, another level of experience that is beyond the confines of the elusive control.  I make new choices, take new actions, and create new realities full of amazing NOVEL experiences.  I AM FREE.

And in the typical synchronicity, as my higher aspects use many methods to show me the path that flows, I was taken to a friend’s post where she shared the very song my guides had been paying for me.  Twisted Sister, “We’re Not Gonna Take It.”  It doesn’t have to be a fight; it is a choice with action and an agreement.  WE ARE FREE.

Published by onefacet

I am consciousness experiencing. Exploring and journeying through this reality while always creating and living the best version of myself, the one I prefer.

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