The last few days have been amazing! I have let go of so much, and naturally, without effort, it just is. I think back to all the years of seeking, seeking, seeking. Which coincidentally NOT are in perfect alignment with my previous addictive nature. I must have more; this is not enough; it is the unconscious mantra made manifest. And so, it was experienced. Suddenly these last three weeks, I have finally realized myself. Even though I have repeated time and time, we are the all, I have finally taken that concept to experience.
It began by me standing against the energy that I said consciously I was not in agreement to but kept a door open to, you know, JUST IN CASE. My just in case was because I feared being alone, abandonment, and not belonging. And why did I fear these things? Because I felt like there was something WRONG with me, or that I was not GOOD ENOUGH. I continued to give my power away outside of myself to things that promised the answers. Of course, this is unconscious programming. Many, many times, more than I can even recall, I have worked to correct these beliefs. But through complete love, acceptance, and trust of myself ON THE INSIDE, I shifted these beliefs enough to take a stand and close the door. And the second that I did, I was thrust into this new experience through a whole new level of the game.
The game is separation, and I have said it many times, the goal is to come into this realm completely asleep, to awaken, remember who you are, and to find your way back to experiencing your wholeness. The kicker, through the seeking, you are TRYING to make something whole of which IS already whole. It is only an illusion, and through beliefs and behaviors, the illusion has become strong. What fun it is to shift beliefs and see the changes in my reality these last ten plus years! AND even though I knew that and consciously played with it, I STILL did not get it. I continued to seek answers through different practices and teachings. Until a few weeks ago, as I mentioned, something changed as I finally realized myself fully.
I took a workshop I had been interested in for many years. Previously I could not afford the workshop or the travel it would take to attend this workshop, so I set the intention to learn all I could and learn about this practice for a few years. It turned into something else entirely once applied, and I thought I just did not have all the CORRECT info; I MUST be MISSING something. When I took the workshop recently, I discovered I already knew ALL this information and so much more. And I no longer felt pulled to participate in the next set of “ADVANCED” teachings. Yet when it was time to attend, I felt that crack in the door of self-doubt. I thought to myself perhaps it was all the videos and books I had read all these years that allowed me to no longer resonate with all the science and protocols; maybe I am just well-practiced, this advanced info will surely show me what I have been seeking.
My goodness, they say if you are doing it correctly, you will levitate. The first course I took was stated that if you do it correctly, you will ascend and disappear; nope, I AM still here. Did I do it WRONG? So, in my moment of distrust of self, I attended the workshop. Immediately, I recognized that by pure intention, I had explored and practiced these very experiences on my own, without ALL these protocols. I stayed on the call for maybe thirty minutes; when my children needed me, it was too easy to walk away. But doing so, that choice literally closed the book of my old life.
What I finally see and know is that these protocols work as the permission slip that allows our conscious minds to expand. My mind was already WAY open; I have no problem traveling the cosmos, feeling, and experiencing my alignment and operation within this realm. I understand frequency and energy in a way that I know how to play with it. Yet, my issue has been trusting that I AM doing it right. I did not fully trust myself. BUT, finally, I was shown that I have already been doing what it is I have been trying to learn how to do! This has been a life theme, a theme of seeking that which I already possess. A belief that I am not enough expressed through seeking more. Until NOW!
Over the last few days, I have watched videos that have confirmed my philosophies and insights of more than ten years that we are returning to experience our wholeness. My current dreams and communications continue to support a huge shift into oneness through integration. By loving all our pieces and parts, we are pulling across time and space experiencing through US individually in this physical body as the singularity. We are integrating all the experience through us in this NOW. This has never been done in the physical, in this way, and that is why it is the greatest show in the multiverse. We have never remembered who we are and fully embodied that expression in the physical. We have never been able to see all the layers of our expression fully. To erase the illusion of separation and to fully know and experience as the source expressed through us in wholeness is a whole new game. This is what we signed up for, the greatest ride in the park of the all!
My dreams since January have been prophetic, and I am beginning to experience myself and my experiences in this reality in a whole new way. I am reminded of the movie the matrix when the oracle says to Neo about knocking the vase over and breaking it; she says not to worry about the vase, “what will really bake your noodle is would you still have broken the vase if I had not said anything.” And this was where I was. Until now, I have had that NEO moment when he begins to believe in who he is.
Everything is in the synchronistic dance; I AM in alignment with the flow more often than I am not. I am experiencing abundance in ways I never thought was possible. Stepping away from that workshop was one more piece in the illusion of separation that was integrated, and the line of separation erased. I have seen a closure of old timelines. They are appearing as old memories coming to the surface sometimes as one experience or a chapter of experiences. My choice to love them and neutralize the energy of each has created a book or binder where it is placed. The book resides in zero point, and the energy of each is integrated fully as the source love that it is within me. I am no longer living through these memories.
When we interact with our environments and relationships, it is done through memory when we are living in the experience of separation. If someone triggers an emotional response in us, it isn’t that moment that is causing it; it is a memory of previous experience. We have been living in memories based on learned beliefs, behaviors, and judgments. The more we integrate and erase the veil of illusion, the more we are in the now moment, no longer living through memory. We step more and more into the flow. This flow is effortless and synchronistic. It has always been the illusion of separation that has caused us to step out of this flow.
Now back to Neo and the oracle, would I have ever experienced these things if I had not believed them in the first place?! Let’s look at my dream in January, I was in a house with green interior walls that my husband had bought, different family members resided there but were not in the same rooms as me. There was a hidden room with white chrysalises everywhere, they would break open a few at a time, and then many and white moths would come out of the hidden room flying out into the open where we all were all lighted up with brilliant bright light. Trump was sitting on my couch reading a newspaper; then he moved to a kitchen island reading a newspaper. I had an old “friend” say she did not like my energy, and she was leaving, I chased her out the door and explained to her she just did not understand it yet. At the same time, I felt myself begin to stand firm in my knowing that there was nothing “wrong” with the energy, it was her perception, and I walked away back into the house. I see so many connections to that moment with Neo and the oracle, and my dreams and experiences down to the green kitchen and clothing she was wearing. The matrix was a movie that I felt was REAL on a level, a moment of awakening to myself for sure, and would continue over time to continue to awaken me through reference to other books and ideas. I have NO problem following the white rabbit. It is the awareness of when seeking shifts to allowing that is the key. Perhaps another blog.
Would I experience this integration and return to my wholeness through the breaking down of the veil of illusion had I not been practicing and believing in it so much these last ten plus years? Right now, almost every video, article, or book is supportive of my claim. Everything outside of me in my immediate sphere is this beautiful alignment. Why? Because I am in a beautiful alignment within myself. My experience of reality is solely based on my beliefs and focus. And I have FINALLY proven to myself that everything I seek is already here within me. Nothing happens to us; we create it! I AM experiencing ascension and levitating because I know I AM. Realizing one’s self, with love and deep trust, opens the door to experiencing this reality in a whole new way. It is the magic we have dreamed of, made manifest by us, through us as the pure source beings that we are. I am Alice and the White Rabbit, it was ME all along!